but the thing is, there has to be.

fall in love. fall i love so thoroughly and unashamedly that you pour everything you have into someone else. let them inside you so deep that they become part of who you are and who you always were and who you always will be. wrap your life around them. begin to plan major events with them. begin to plan minor events with them. begin to plan your day around them. end your day with them and begin your day with them too. watch them unfold before you and shine. plan the rest of your life together. watch them amaze you. watch them falter and love them anyway. then watch them falter and notice that it bothers you. watch them come home late and forget to call. watch them cancel plans to do something with someone else. watch them not remember to do the things you asked countless times. let it sit too long until you can't take it anymore and then explode in anger at them. listen to them apologize and forgive them and let them back into your bed. watch them make the same mistakes again and again. don't let it sit anymore, but point it out every single time, thinking maybe then they'll understand how they're messing up. argue your point when they make excuses. listen to them apologize and pretend to forgive them but don't let them back in to your bed. start to notice everything they do wrong. forget the reasons you loved them in the first place. intentionally make plans without them. avoid making plans with them, because then they can't cancel on you. see them less and less. go to bed while they're still out and leave in the morning before they wake up. start drinking. forget who you are as a person. drink more. watch them start to drink more. question whether or not you still love them. become complacent. stop waiting for them to ever call. wait until they bring it up and then tell them you need a break. feel a false sense of freedom. feel an empty pit in your stomach whenever you're alone. go out every night and drink to fill the empty pit. find yourself home alone with them on a quiet night. drink together. end up in bed together. feel connected again. wake up the next morning and wonder where you stand. keep busy for weeks and then fall into bed together again. repeat for months. keep busy and realize that you haven't seen them in months. wake up one day and decide you want to salvage what you had. be surprised when you discover they've fallen in love with someone else. feel betrayed. feel lost. cry yourself to sleep every night. try to find yourself again. become social. try things you've always wanted to try. go out with a few other people. become happy. continue to grow. every now and then remember them and cry some more. become successful. make new friends. look happy. feel happy, most of the time. go on dates with other people but remain unimpressed. plan a different future for yourself.  think about them more often than you should. miss them, but never mention it to anyone. wonder if you'll ever fall in love again.